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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28159413">you have [18] new messages</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/rain_sleet_snow/pseuds/rain_sleet_snow'>rain_sleet_snow</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, The Mandalorian (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Brother-Sister Relationships, During Canon, Epistolary, F/M, Force-Sensitive Leia Organa, Gen, Legal Drama, Leia Is Confused And Therefore Furious, Luke Skywalker Is Bad At Communicating, New Jedi Order (Star Wars), New Republic, New Republic Politics (Star Wars), News Media, POV Outsider, Parenthood, Politics, Senator Leia Organa, Swearing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 18:08:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,202</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28159413</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/rain_sleet_snow/pseuds/rain_sleet_snow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Leia's view of events leading up to the recapture of Moff Gideon, told through all the messages Luke left on read.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Organa &amp; Luke Skywalker, Din Djarin &amp; Cara Dune, Din Djarin &amp; Grogu | Baby Yoda, Leia Organa &amp; Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa &amp; Luke Skywalker &amp; Ahsoka Tano, Leia Organa &amp; Luke Skywalker &amp; Han Solo, Leia Organa/Han Solo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>129</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>716</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>you have [18] new messages</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wrote this in an hourlong sprint after watching THAT EPISODE, I have not had it beta'd, I am still slightly hysterical, I am not sorry.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>You have [eighteen] new messages from [L].</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Luke, I don’t know what the fuck is going on with you, but you don’t just leave Ben at the Senate reception and rush off because you </span>
  <em>
    <span>had a vision</span>
  </em>
  <span>, fucking explain yourself. I had to get Threepio to watch him, and you know exactly how well that works! </span>
  <em>
    <span>Trials for war crimes</span>
  </em>
  <span> are</span>
  <em>
    <span> very kriffing delicate</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Luke, as we discussed last time one of the bastards got himself acquitted! Ben can’t just sit in the bottom of my pod and draw shit on the floor with crayons! </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>You could at least have called Han, you banthaswiving wretch, call me when you get this.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Are you in hyperspace? Did you go to </span>
  <em>
    <span>hyperspace </span>
  </em>
  <span>to get away from your bad decisions? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ben is inconsolable, I hope you know. This is all your fault. I ended up giving him ice-cream as a treat and he ate too much and was sick. Everywhere. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>If I have to get Threepio to encode a message to Artoo just to get you to</span>
  <em>
    <span> call me back</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Luke Skywalker, I am your gods-damned </span>
  <em>
    <span>sister</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I swear on every crumb of departed Alderaan -  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Augh</span>
  </em>
  <span>!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I didn’t mean that, I’m sorry, but will you kindly explain why the fuck your beacon says you’re on Tython. I thought we agreed when I hauled you ass-first out of that horrible little temple we wouldn’t be setting foot in that system ever again. If you’re stuck there you’ll have to wait until someone can get hold of Ahsoka again, which, let me tell you, will not be any time soon. Enjoy your frozen rations, you little shit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Why the hell is Lor San Tekka comming me asking to know when you’re coming back to the New Jedi Temple? Did you not at least tell the manager of the organisation you run where you were off to? Luke, you’re supposed to be teaching these people. Being head of the Jedi Order is not compatible with fucking off to kriff knows where -</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’ll mind my own language however I fucking want, Vaspar, this is a fuck-it-all </span>
  <em>
    <span>barracks</span>
  </em>
  <span>, not a Coruscanti tea party, and can I remind you not to eavesdrop on my </span>
  <em>
    <span>shitting </span>
  </em>
  <span>private calls? I could have been on the line with my husband, for all you know. Thank you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>… Luke, call Lor back before he sets Mara Jade on you. Much as I love the holos of your miserable ass being dragged out of</span>
  <em>
    <span> complete ignominy</span>
  </em>
  <span> by her, I’d like to know you’re safe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hey, Luke! This is Han on Leia’s comm. She wants me to ask where the fuck you’ve got to now and why she keeps getting cryptic bastard -</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>HAN </span>
  </em>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oh, sh- sugar, Ben, baby, that’s a bad word, don’t -</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Bas-tard! Bas-tard!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>- Look, Luke, will you just answer your sister’s calls so we’re not reliant on your cranky old droid to know you haven’t, I don’t know, been eaten by a wampa. Again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck -</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This is all your fault, Luke.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Luke, why have I got a message from Davits Draven wanting to know what you’re doing pissing around in the Outer Rim? And if you really are pissing around in the Outer Rim could you please pick up Lando’s tip about the rhydonium? I have a very bad feeling about it, but I’m busy right now, in case you hadn’t noticed senatorial life isn’t glitz if you’re doing the fucking job.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Which would be easier to do if my brother wasn’t on some fucking quest he </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>refuses to tell me </em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>anything about, but is having </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>anxiety dreams</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span> about</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Do you even know where you’re going? Did you even sit down for five minutes and actually think through an actual, reasonable plan that isn’t just following the kriffing Force? Did you know I can sense your anxiety dreams from across the galaxy? We should probably talk about that! And you’re not on the same sleep schedule as me either! You may be sleeping but I’m trying to sit through a meeting with the Joint Chiefs! </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Pick up your fucking comm Luke </b>
  <b>
    <em>Boba Fett isn’t dead</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Okay, okay, maybe I overreacted, Han says he’s the one Boba Fett has hated for decades, and seeing as it wasn’t you who knocked him into the sarlacc pit, you are probably okay. Han is sticking to Chandrila with me and I’m fairly confident I’d know if Boba Fett came after him. You may be off questing for fuck knows what - Trask? Really? What the fuck is on Trask, other than Bo-Katan Kryze and her annoying little pack of saboteurs?  - but while you’re searching the galaxy for enlightenment, please keep half an eye out for the man in the armour. Love you, don’t get shot, don’t get your other hand chopped off, etcetera.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Luke, you need to come back to Chandrila right away, I just got read in on some hellish, off-the-books dark ops Draven’s sanctioned, something to do with a Force-sensitive child - Anyway, no, of course, don’t come back to Chandrila, but you need to get to the nearest New Republic outpost so we can give you the intel. The team, I don’t know who they are yet but it’s a small fire team led by a Marshal from the Outer Rim - I recognise the name, she served with the shocktroopers back in the day - they’re planning to run a sneak attack on a light cruiser and it just strikes me that this is one time when a Jedi Knight might come in very handy indeed -</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Uncle Luke can you call Mama? She’s very sad and cross. But sad cross. And scared. And she swears a lot.</span>
  <em>
    <span> A lot</span>
  </em>
  <span> a lot. Also when you come back, will you take me podracing?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Okay.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bye.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ahsoka Tano just left me a message, she says she can’t get hold of you because you’re in hyperspace again, why she thinks I can I don’t know, it’s not like you ever listen to me anyway. She says it’s about the child and it’s very, very important, and you apparently know what that means. No-one ever bothers to tell me fucking anything. Not even in the middle of the night.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Leia, honey</span>
  </em>
  <span> -</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I think I have a right to be pissed, Han! It’s four in the fucking morning!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Just call Ahsoka back, Luke, or get Artoo to do it, and in the future, I am not your personal assistant, actually communicate with people, please. Thank you. Fuck you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hey Luke. Glad to hear you’re all right. Less glad that I had to get that news in a three-line emergency data burst from Cara Dune, who I wouldn’t know from a hole in the wall. Listen to your messages all the way through and call me back before I record Ben singing Baby Rancor and have Artoo play it through your speakers all the way back to the Temple. Do you know how fucking pervasive that song is, Luke? You will literally never forget it. Literally never. I caught myself humming it under my breath at a fucking gala yesterday. Han had to stand on my foot and then I called him a nerf-herder in front of a kriffing media-droid, and now my press officer is having to release statements about how we are and remain happily married.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>FOR THE LAST MOTHER-FUCKING TIME, LUKE, </span>
  <em>
    <span>ANSWER YOUR FUCKING COMM</span>
  </em>
  <span>. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS WITH THIS? FORCE FUCK A MOTHER-FUCKING </span>
  <em>
    <span>RATHTAR</span>
  </em>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Senator, Chancellor Mothma is asking to speak with you, at your earliest convenience? It’s regarding the indictment - well, the re-indictment - of former Moff Gideon.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>OH, FOR ABSOLUTE FUCKING BANTHASHIT. Larma, thank you, I’ll be with her in just a second - shit, did you see where my clean robe went?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>LUKE, WE’LL TALK ABOUT THIS LATER.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Luke Skywalker, I swear on the bones of my mother, you have the common sense of a concussed wampa. I have the report from Cara Dune here. I’ve read it backwards. I cannot believe the stones of you, just waltzing merrily onto an entire Imperial light cruiser, no back-up, no heavy firepower, just you, your lightsaber, and Artoo. Are you unhinged? Do we need to talk about your apparent death wish? And why the hell is Artoo sending me messages about baby Jedi from the old days, incidentally?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No, wait, that’s a sidebar at best. It is a completely irrelevant distraction from my main point, which is:</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>LUKE, </span>
  <em>
    <span>YOU CANNOT ABDUCT OTHER PEOPLE’S CHILDREN.</span>
  </em>
  <span> YOU CAN’T EVEN ABDUCT YOUR </span>
  <em>
    <span>OWN </span>
  </em>
  <span>CHILDREN, IF YOU HAD CHILDREN, WHICH YOU DON’T! IT’S ILLEGAL! IT’S ILLEGAL FOR </span>
  <em>
    <span>SEVERAL EXCELLENT REASONS</span>
  </em>
  <span>! DO YOU HAVE </span>
  <em>
    <span>ANY IDEA</span>
  </em>
  <span> HOW MANY NEW REPUBLIC LAWS YOU’VE JUST BROKEN? BEING A JEDI DOESN’T CONFER LEGAL IMMUNITY! WE’VE BEEN OVER THIS! JUST BECAUSE THE OLD REPUBLIC JEDI DID IT, WHICH I ACTUALLY DON’T BELIEVE THEY DID, DOESN’T MEAN YOU CAN!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oh, you Class A nerf-herding cretin, I can’t even begin to tell you what a fucking mess you’ve made! Dune’s report gets a bit incoherent around the point where you strode onto the bridge like a hero of old, and can I just say, one of these days you’re going to trip on that horrible cloak - you were wearing the cloak, weren’t you? Of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course </span>
  </em>
  <span>you were, I don’t even need to ask. But she is clear about some points! One of which is that Din Djarin, who the New Republic now owes a lot of money and probably some medals and definitely protection from Bo-Katan Kryze, whatever that asshole is up to now, relinquished his parental rights under the impression that he had to do so for you to train this kid. Which I assume is the same child Ahsoka Tano was talking about when she called me back? Did you take her call? I hope you took her fucking call, because she was extremely clear about not teaching that baby anything he can use to kill people before he’s old enoug  h to go to therapy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>Oh, sweet tears of Jedha, I can’t believe that’s an actual sentence I had to utter. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Anyway! Luke! You moron! I know you didn’t exactly grow up with a whole lot of law on Tatooine, but can I remind you that in the New Republic a verbal relinquishment of rights is not sufficient to sever the parental tie! You are currently, legally speaking, kidnapping a child, and next time I see you, I’m going to have to arrest you! In fact, I might do it just to teach you a Force-damned lesson! You know it isn’t necessary for parents to cut ties for people to be trained in the Force! At least, if you haven’t figured that out, then what the fuck have you been doing with Ben? Let me tell you, I am not handing you custody of my baby just so you can teach him to levitate shit. You couldn’t take care of him for one measly day without having a vision and running off to go waste fuel questing around the galaxy, looking for someone I could very easily have pointed you in the direction of had you </span>
  <em>
    <span>stayed put </span>
  </em>
  <span>for five minutes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hey, princess, I’m home -</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>One moment, Han! Did you even get Din Djarin’s contact information, Luke? Of course you didn’t. Luckily for you, because it sounds like the man is </span>
  <em>
    <span>completely catatonic with heartbreak </span>
  </em>
  <span>from the loss of his child however temporary - Luke, this one random drifter wearing enough beskar to bribe the whole Senate just fought his way through an entire Imperial cruiser and beat up the New Republic’s most wanted to get his baby back; did you even give him time to say </span>
  <em>
    <span>goodbye</span>
  </em>
  <span>? Well, luckily for you, Marshal Dune is a friend of his - and not a fan of yours, by the way, and I don’t blame her - and she is keeping him under close watch, and if I can locate her, I can locate him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I was going to offer you a caf, but…</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No, Han. I want brandy. Now. Oh, say hi to Luke, why don’t you?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>… hey, Luke. Where the fuck have you been? I thought you got this shit out of your system around Hoth? Your sister’s going spare. Will you just do what she tells you so we can all have some peace and quiet around here?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Thank you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>My sainted ancestors, Luke Skywalker. You motherfucker. I can’t believe you’ve put me in this position. Get your ass back to the New Jedi Temple immediately and get on the line at once, do you hear me? I don’t care what time it is. And I want holographic proof that the baby is alive and happy as soon as you can transmit images. And if you are very, very lucky I will get this sorted so you don’t need a lawyer and the press stays out of it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>- Oh, thank you, Han. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Love you, princess.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Love you too. Luke, I’m not going to send you my love, you’ve given me a headache the size of Endor’s forest moon, but I’m glad you’re not dead. Call me when you get this. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You have [no] new messages. Press aurek to listen again, besh to archive messages, cresh to delete messages.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><div class="children module" id="children">
  <b class="heading">Works inspired by this one:</b>
  <ul>
    <li>
        <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28863312">you have [18] new messages [Podfic]</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackglass/pseuds/blackglass">blackglass</a>
    </li>
  </ul>
</div></div></div>
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